The following 15 police comments were taken from actual Dallas Police car videos and distributed by Monica Smith, Director DPD, Public Relations Officer:
#15. Relax; the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch out after you wear them awhile.
#14. Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document.
#13. If you run, you'll only go to jail tired.
#12. Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second?
#11. So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?
#10. Yes sir, by all means you can talk to the shift supervisor if you think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?
#9. Warning? You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you that when you run that stop sign again, I'll give you another ticket.
#8. The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?
#7. Fair?......You want me to be fair? Listen pal, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in horsey doo!
#6. Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven.
#5. No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want.
#4. Just how big were those two beers?
#3. In God we trust, all others we run through the records department.
#2. I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail.
And....................THE BEST ONE!!!!!!!
#1. Excuse me ma'am? You didn't think we give pretty women tickets?
Well, you are right, we don't. Now, sign here