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Author Topic: Dogs and Cats  (Read 9007 times)

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Haly

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Dogs and Cats
« on: 18. December 2006, 06:31:39 (06:31 AM) »
A Day in the Life of "The Dog" and "The Cat"

***********************************


From the Dog's Daily Diary:


8:00 a.m. Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!

9:30 a.m. Oh, boy! A car ride! My favorite!

9:40 a.m. Oh, boy! A walk! My favorite!

10:30 a.m. Oh, boy! Getting rubbed and petted! My favorite!

11:30 a.m. Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!

Noon Oh, boy! The kids! My favorite!

1:00 p.m. Oh, boy! The yard! My favorite!

4:00 p.m. Oh, boy! To the park! My favorite!

5:00 p.m. Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!

5:30 p.m. Oh, boy! Pretty Mums! My favorite!

6:00 p.m. Oh, boy! Playing ball! My favorite!

6:30 a.m. Oh, boy! Watching TV with my master! My favorite!

8:30 p.m. Oh, boy! Sleeping in master's bed! My favorite!




From the Cat's Daily Diary:


Day 183 of My Captivity: My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going insane is the hope of escape, and the mild scolding I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture.


Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant. Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair, must try this on their bed.

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan.


There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to my power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured.

But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...
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Chilvod

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Re: Dogs and Cats
« Reply #1 on: 18. December 2006, 09:06:51 (09:06 AM) »
lol
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Nympha

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Re: Dogs and Cats
« Reply #2 on: 18. December 2006, 12:40:24 (12:40 PM) »
 :2funny:  :2funny:  :2funny:  :2funny:  :2funny:  :2funny:  :2funny:  :2funny:  :2funny:


/em wipes tears from his eyes.
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Felicitous

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Re: Dogs and Cats
« Reply #3 on: 18. December 2006, 16:15:46 (04:15 PM) »
 O0  :2funny: :sign10: :2funny: Great post!!!
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Portheos

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Re: Dogs and Cats
« Reply #4 on: 18. December 2006, 17:20:02 (05:20 PM) »
hoo ha ha. Loved it
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binglefoot

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Re: Dogs and Cats
« Reply #5 on: 19. December 2006, 00:42:14 (12:42 AM) »
Having been a dog and cat owner I can couch for this. Every once in whiel I would look up and my cat would be staring ta me. Now I know what it was thinking (Although I always suspected it was soemthign like this)


Lea
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Haly

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Re: Dogs and Cats
« Reply #6 on: 19. December 2006, 07:05:05 (07:05 AM) »
Quote from: Binglefoot on 19. December 2006, 00:42:14 (12:42 AM)
Having been a dog and cat owner I can couch for this. Every once in whiel I would look up and my cat would be staring ta me. Now I know what it was thinking (Although I always suspected it was soemthign like this)


Lea


Bingle,

Your typos really bring new meaning to what it is you really want to say.
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Zorette

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Re: Dogs and Cats
« Reply #7 on: 19. December 2006, 08:43:57 (08:43 AM) »
lol  :2funny:

Was that Dogs day really Chilvods?  ;)
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Haly

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Re: Dogs and Cats
« Reply #8 on: 19. December 2006, 15:53:05 (03:53 PM) »
Becareful! You don't want to insult dogs.  :angel:
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Chilvod

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Re: Dogs and Cats
« Reply #9 on: 19. December 2006, 16:08:07 (04:08 PM) »
Grrrr bark bark Grrrr
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Zorette

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Re: Dogs and Cats
« Reply #10 on: 19. December 2006, 16:19:38 (04:19 PM) »
 :2funny:
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